Sunday was a wonderful day for Jake and I. We are doing so well, Jake especially! I am so proud of the steps that he has made to recieve this recommend. The atonement works! The best part is, is that Jake feels worthy to step into the walls of the Lord's house. What an incredible blessing it will be to watch him get his endowments. I can't wait till the 7th when I get to watch him make those covenants with the Lord. I'm especially excited to pray next to him in that room. I can't wait to see him in the celestrial room. I know the tears will come, much like the tears came when I opened the letter that said I could be sealed to Jake for time and all eternity. Miracles happen! Jake is one of my miracles! I can't wait for the 9th. I get to be Mrs. Jacob Ray Seward. I get to be his forever and ever!! What a blessing! I thank Heavenly Father everyday for ledding me to Oregon to find my Mr. Right!
look at all those guns, i have so much to learn about my man
dinning room, thanks Sewards for the table and chairs
living/family room
kitchen (has the oldest stove I've ever seen, lets hope it works)
This is it. It doesn't look like much. This is actually after most of the boxes have been unpacked. We don't have much. It doesn't feel very homey right now, but hopefully once we get some wedding gifts to fill up the emptiness and do a little more decorating it will feel like home.Hopefully we will be able to tone down all the brown.
We were blessed to be able to get a king size bed so that Jake could actually sleep on the bed without having his feet hanging off or having to sleep diagonally. For the next couple weeks Jake will be sporting this apartment on his own. Live it up bachelor because I'll be there soon to womanize the place! ;) Jake feels a little bad that he couldn't give me everything I wanted, but honestly I can find myself being completely happy in this brown kitchen. The noise shouldn't bother us to much! ;) It will be a place to find a little bit of heaven on earth. I cant wait to share it with the man of my dreams.
I have always loved Disney movies. It's a softer way of teaching about the good and evil of the world. That the good always wins in the end. Well this ending clip of Aladdin has special meaning to me now. Well sort of. I used this clip, or one very similar to this one to announce to my friends and family here in Oregon that I was free. Free of what they didn't know. I couldn't tell them at the time until I got the ok from President Brady. On May 9th I got the best letter I have ever received....EVER!! I got my letter from the first presidency of the church declaring that as of May 7th I was no longer sealed to Daniel. I am finally free from a man who tore me down everyday of my life with him. My family still does not know what happened behind closed doors with Daniel and I and maybe they never will. If they ever knew what really happened in my marriage they would definitely think twice before ever letting him see his boys again.
It is hard at times to think about the reality of the past. My choice of Daniel was a terrible one. It cost me greatly. It cost me my boys. My family still praises Daniel for staying with me after I got sick and we chose to give up the boys. Little did/do the realize the complete selfishness that was made in that decision. He didn't want to be a father. Didn't want the responsibilities, yet my family thought I was the reason why...Sigh! Daniel could control me, do whatever he wanted with me. With the boys he lost his temper frequently. I am so grateful that they do not have Daniel as their father roll model. Statistics show that if you come from an abusive family that you are more likely to be abusive yourself. Well in Daniel's case he became one of the statistics. My family may never know the struggles that I dealt with in those 7 long years of marriage. It's a time in my life that I'm ashamed of.
Thankfully my Heavenly Father gave me the courage, strength, and the ok to get away from that unhealthy atmosphere. It was just over two years ago that I packed up my things and left Daniel. It was a very scary time in my life. Everyone around me wanted me to try and make things work out. I knew that I had made the right decision for me. I am so grateful that I stuck to my guns and filed for that divorce. I remember the day I got my divorce papers in the mail. The state had set me free from this awful experience. I was grateful and continued to start to move on.
This past week in getting the letter from the first presidency with all their signatures on it was a healing experience for me. As I read the letter I fell to my knees in gratitude. It was a humbling experience and even though I knew I had made the right decision in leaving Daniel and moving on with my life and planning my wedding with Jake it was so beautiful to see those signatures. It was like another witness for me that the Lord was pleased with my decision then and He is pleased with my decision now. So as of May 7th I have been a free woman. Even in the eternal perspective of things. Now I knew that Daniel at least at this point in his life would not be in the celestial kingdom, he doesn't have a current temple recommend. I wish I could explain to you the relief in knowing that my choice back then my huge mistake....that I will not be stuck to that decision for the eternities. That the Lord has given me a second chance and that I can now be sealed to Jake for time and all eternity in the walls of the Lords house in June.
I am a freeeee lady! Well at least for a month, but even then I will still be free. I will just have someone to share my freedom with. I will actually be married to someone who truly wants the same things that I want. That will uplift me as I uplift him. " I chose you!! I chose you" 'Jake'!
Yesterday was a day I have been dreading to come for over a year now. I turned the big 3-0!!! Ahhh! I'm so old! I think I feel even older now that I'm with someone that is so much younger than I am. Jake just turned 24 this past February. Some funny facts with our age differences.
I was baptized when Jake was 3 yrs. old.
Jake was baptized at the time I was first wearing a training bra.
When I went on my first date Jake was still in 6th grade.
When I graduated High School Jake just started the Young Men's Program.
When Jake turned 16 I just had my first child.
When Jake graduated High School I was going to college for a second time.
So...that was supposed to cheer me up and make me laugh....well maybe it will in the future. Maybe.
The goal is to be able to walk/run this 5k in September in Portland with Jake. Even after feeling the pain this past week after walking in the March of Dimes this past weekend. I still want to do this. It maybe just because I can be like a little kid again and get as dirty as possible. It's a little spendy but I'm hoping Jake will register for it for my birthday. I might have to have him actually read this post to get how badly I want to do this....or maybe I'll just tell him myself. (It's cheaper if you register now hun!)
